Today's Battle: Now vs. the Future

When I look at T Junior I can't help wonder what kind of person will he be. What will he look like when he grows out of his baby face? Will he like sports? I wonder when he will start talking and walking? But every time I start thinking these things, I panic inside because I don't want to skip what I'm witnessing in him right now.

While I can't wait to see how T Junior grows and becomes his own person, I also don't want him to change. How will I live without the gummy smiles that make his eyes crinkle and shine? What will I do without those precious coos and ga-gas? I adore how he looks at me wide-eyed in wonder and amusement when I do something unpredictable like shake my hair or stick my tongue between my lips and blow. I love how he can pinch me with his toes. Even his sad face is adorable (I truly never realized anyone could stick their bottom lip out so far).

Even when he's mad, he's cute.
Good distance on the bottom lip, buddy!

Now that I am a mom, I often catch myself wondering about other moms whose babies are grown up. When I'm watching a baseball game, for example, I find myself thinking about the pitcher's mother; wondering if she swells with pride every time her son is on the mound. When I see stories about criminals on the news, I think about how sad the mother of this person must be. What kind of hopes and dreams did she have for him? I'm sure she didn't think he would be a thief/fill-in-the-blank.

Even though all of T Junior's fun little baby habits will eventually be washed away with time, I vow to always remember them. I also promise to revel in his future talents whatever they may be.

But, wait. I'm getting ahead of myself again. Today, I just want to wade in his cuteness.